Close Your Eyes
by ObsessiveCompulsiveValkyrie
Summary: He knew he made the right choice. Now he has only his conscience to answer to for breaking her heart. Setsuna/Feldt. Setsuna's POV. Companion to And I'll Close Mine.


Welcome to my G00 archive! This fic takes place as if the movie happened, and given the lack of information on the ELS, I took poetic license and experimented. This is my personal take on them, and please let me know if you like it :) On that note, I'm not opposed to the movie. I thought it was rushed and it would have been better as a third season with more development. Frankly, Descartes's role seemed a little pointless.

Moving on, this fic is inspired partially by the Flyleaf song, _So I Thought._ On top of that, this piece has a companion fic from Feldt's POV, though that one is rated M for adult content called _And I'll Close Mine_. It really doesn't matter which one you read first, as both support each other. That being said, I hope you enjoy!

Gundam 00 is copyright of Bandai Entertainment and _So I Thought_ is copyright of Flyleaf and their record label.

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><p><strong>Close Your Eyes<strong>

_Fifty years now…_

He leaned back in his seat, tightly gripping a pressurized bottle of liquor in his right hand. Two more empty bottles floated behind him in zero gravity, leaving an obvious trace of his annual habit.

_Fifty years should be a special anniversary, don't you guys think?_

His eyes turned to look at the photographs placed on the board over his desk, one in particular showing an image of eleven people with varying expressions. Christina was grinning brightly, floating in the briefing room to the original Ptolomy, arms around the shoulders of a panicking Lichty. Lasse and Allelujah stood with humored expressions as they watched the 'crazy kids' interact. Sumeragi had—what else?—a bottle of beer in her hand, but smiled as Lockon—the first one—laughed at the cheerful moment.

_Fifty years… How time flies, eh?_

Ian and Dr. Moreno—He never had gotten used to calling the man by his first name—were standing side-by-side, the mechanic's hand on the doctor's back in an amused pat. Tieria stood on the very edge of the photograph, arms crossed and a pout on his lips. Then, of course, there he was, uncomfortably stiff in his blue pilot suit, staring straight at the camera as if it was an automaton aiming to kill him.

Then, finally, beside Christina and Lichty, stood Feldt. She held Haro in her hands, eying her insane co-technician with a look that almost resembled fear. His hand reached out without his consent and slowly touched her face, then withdrew as soon as he realized what he was doing.

The photo beside that one held the crew of the Ptolomy II, with the other Lockon, and Anew and Mileina instead of Christina and Lichty. Linda stood by Ian, and Saji and Marie made the total add up to thirteen. Other pictures included one of each Lockon, posted beside each other for comparison—the likeness was uncanny. They even wore their hair the same—another of Saji smiling bashfully with his then-girlfriend, Louise. If those two hadn't gotten married after all they'd been through, he would have wondered if they were sane.

Then there was one of Tieria, looking bored and uninterested. Sumeragi with her friend, Billy, Allelujah and Marie on their wedding day, and another of Allelujah smiling shyly but proudly while holding his firstborn son, Sergei.

Then, one of Feldt. She had been twenty-one in that photograph. It was before the ELS had appeared, but after she had all but confessed her feelings for him. He wasn't entirely sure what to think on that matter. He had never been romantically involved with anyone before, and the concept itself was something that hadn't even occurred to him. He lived his life fighting a war of gastric proportions.

Then, after the ELS had struck, he had found his already changing body shifting and becoming one of them. He knew, the moment he'd next laid eyes on Feldt, that it would never work. He was no longer human in any way. No matter what she felt, no matter what he thought he might have felt, there was no predicting what he was capable of anymore.

He closed his eyes and gripped the zero-G-friendly bottle even more tightly, frowning as his hand shifted to its metallic state and his fingers jutted out into spikes. Even after fifty years, he still didn't have complete control of his half-ELS body.

He'd made the right choice in letting Feldt go.

He hadn't let it bother him until a few years later, when he found himself back in the slowly-reforming land of Krugis and stumbled upon a yellow desert flower. It was just like the one she had given him and the same as the one the ELS had formed. It had sparked something inside him, made him realize how much he'd missed her.

_Do I even have the right to miss her?_

She had cried when he told her he couldn't be with her. A pang of guilt had engulfed him because, more than anything else, he considered her to be his friend. She was the member of Celestial Being closest to him in age, and he had learned to respect her knowledge and advice. She had a good heart, and her reaction to his denial had only made him realize how much she truly cared about him.

No, how much she loved him.

But he wasn't human. He had no idea what would happen to him since he'd merged with the ELS. He could have dropped dead the next day, or he could have phased completely into one of them. He didn't know. But she… she had been raised in space. She'd barely known her parents, and she was one of the main operatives in a private organization by the age of twelve.

He respected her, and he wanted her to live a full and happy life. He wanted her to live with someone who would love her and age with her and not have the unpredictability of not knowing what was in store. Even after fifty years, his heart still ached when he thought about her tear-stained face. The humanity buried deep within his heart had chosen that moment to surface, and wouldn't let him walk away without trying to explain.

She listened patiently to his concerns, and tried to tell him she didn't care. She had seen it all, right? But he wanted her to be happy and loved by someone who could truly cherish her, so he stood and moved to leave her room on the Ptolomy. He froze when her hands clasped around his arm, her broken voice quietly asking him to stay. He'd stiffened up and stayed silent. He didn't know how to handle a woman in a situation like that. Having the ability to effectively break up with a woman wasn't on his list of need-to-know items.

But, deep in his heart, he knew she wasn't just a woman. She was Feldt Grace, his friend and the first girl to show romantic interest in him – the horror called Nena Trinity aside. He didn't know if it was his quantum brainwaves that told him, or maybe the ELS assimilate, or maybe it was the part of him that was still human. Regardless of how he knew, he knew he had to be honest and treat her with respect.

So he asked her what he could do. He asked her what he could do to help her attachment to him break. Her face had buried into the back of his shoulder as her hands gripped his shirt, her voice muffled by the dark blue fabric. His brainwaves had told him exactly what she'd wanted, and he felt he had little choice but to comply. Deep in his heart, he wanted to comply.

That night spent with her had been the epilogue of their short-lived relationship. It had been his first and, to date, only time being that intimate with a woman, but he hadn't let himself get distracted. When he awoke the following morning, he had dressed and wrote a quick note for her, then left.

"_From this day forward, __I am dead. I will never answer calls, and I will not come to visit. If you feel the need to talk about me, tell people I died. I am nothing more any longer. I am a phantom, living the life of a demon trapped in the existence of a rebuilding world. There is still hope for you. You'll meet friends and live a long, happy life. You'll be able to find a man who can be strong for you and love you. I can't do that with certainty, so goodbye, Kira Lorre."_

His access to Veda had yielded her true name, and he felt it would only be fair if she knew he knew. Despite that, he'd signed the letter as Setsuna F. Seiei, not Soran Ibrahim. The moment he sat in the pilot seat of Exia, he had discarded that name and the dark past that went with it. He had begun again, aiming to become like the Gundam itself. Setsuna F. Seiei became his name. Soran was, in his mind, dead.

Just as Setsuna should be to Feldt.

He sighed and closed his eyes, leaning back in his seat and bringing the bottle of pure Russian vodka to his lips. He blamed Sumeragi for getting him to drink in the first place and Allelujah for the choice of drink. For being so calm and kindhearted, that man could find his way to the bottom of a bottle pretty quickly if he wanted to. Of course, since he'd become a father, his occasional drinking binges had been cut down to nearly non-existent.

To his understanding, the former Gundam Meister did still drink, but he did so responsibly and usually only for special occasions. The man was too benign for his own good. Then again, his other half made up for that.

A small blip sounded on his screen, signaling an incoming message. He had made his home alone on an isolated spacecraft carrying his Gundam, contacted by Celestial Being when something was needed, and only they knew of his existence. The only people he kept in regular contact with were Saji Crossroad and Allelujah and his family. The Super Soldier, his wife, their children, and now their grandchildren all had the quantum brainwaves, so they were easier to keep in contact with.

He tapped the icon to open the message and raised an eyebrow at the white-haired man on the monitor. The man offered a slight smile and a wave, saying, "Hey, there, Setsuna."

He blinked with disinterest. "…Allelujah?"

"We haven't spoken in awhile, but I wanted to touch base with you."

His mind failed to come up with a reasonable thing to say, so instead he started with, "You look…"

The gentle-hearted man with mismatched eyes gave a light laugh and muttered, "Just say it. I look old."

"There's something to be said for that," was his simple reply.

"I was just going to say, you still look the exact same."

"Fifty years and counting."

"Makes me feel old."

"You have grandchildren, Allelujah. You should feel old."

He sighed and held up his hands in a casual dismissal. "Speaking of, Mikhail wanted to talk to you. He said he found something Tieria said you would want to know, but he wouldn't tell me."

"Mikhail?" He wouldn't say it up-front, but that boy was his favorite of Allelujah's and Marie's descendants. Between Sergei, Ksenia, and Mischa, Ksenia had been the most level-headed and had quickly garnered his attention. Back then, when the three were young, he had spent more time with the children, mostly because the two young parents were helping him gain practice with his quantum brainwaves. The family lived in space, aboard the latest mothership of Celestial Being. Setsuna had stayed there with them until he decided he should leave, to hide his seemingly unaging self from the new recruits.

In time, he had learned Ksenia had married and had a son, yielding the birth of Mikhail. The boy had his grandfather's coloring, except both eyes were gold, and a personality along the median between Allelujah and Hallelujah. Setsuna had visited more often and, once Veda had cleared the boy to be a Gundam Meister of Zabanya's descendant, had taken him under his wing, teaching him all there was to know.

"Yeah. He said it was important, and he sounded a little serious."

"All right. I'll send him a message when I close comm. with you."

"Actually, he's here right now, visiting his old Grandpa and Grandma for a few days," he said with a smile. Allelujah and Marie had since retired to a space colony, living in a peaceful world in their old age.

He felt a slight smile cross his lips. Allelujah was meant to have a family. It was clear the man loved all three of his children and all seven of his grandchildren. Any fool with eyes could see it, even someone as static and closed off as Setsuna. "You love every second of being a grandpa and you know it."

He smiled and reached up to scratch the side of his head. "You're right, Setsuna. I do."

"Seventy-six and you've got more grandkids than Lockon has gray hairs."

"The man colors and we both know it."

"One would think he'd let it go now that he's broken eighty."

"Who are we to judge?"

He sighed one more time and leaned back, raising his bottle to his lips for another drink. He closed his eyes in silent contemplation, letting one open again when his old companion spoke. "How is your anniversary going?"

He heaved yet another sigh and took a long gulp of his drink. "It's going."

His 'anniversary' was the day he'd chosen to remember all of the members of Celestial Being who had died. He'd chosen the day of the battle at Lagrange 1 to mourn his comrades, no matter when they actually died. It was actually Saji's idea, to avoid mourning all-year round and instead press it all together into one day. It was a sound idea, and he had followed through every year, always sitting alone with liquor and the ELS network as his only companions.

Allelujah looked as if he wanted to say more, but then stopped as his attention shifted to something outside the monitor range. He smiled and waved someone over, saying "Mikhail! Setsuna's on the line!"

The boy, only nineteen now, called back, "Coming, Grandpa! Let me just help Grandma with the groceries first!"

"Go talk to Setsuna. I'll help your grandma." Allelujah shifted to stand in front of the monitor, still waving his grandson over. He smiled a little wider and shifted his other hand to wave to Setsuna, saying, "It was good to talk to you again. You should call a little more often. Bye, Setsuna."

He barely nodded a farewell before a youthful face appeared in the screen, a smile on his lips and gold eyes glinting in amusement. "Hey, Uncle Setsuna!"

He rolled his eyes and took another drink from his bottle. "Don't call me that."

"Well, my mom called you that, so would you rather 'Granduncle Setsuna'?"

"I'd rather just 'Setsuna.'"

The boy shrugged lightly and puffed his lip out in thought as he said, "You shouldn't drink, either. Is that another bottle I see behind you?"

He held up his fore and middle fingers in a 'V' shape before muttering, "Two."

Mikhail sighed and shook his head. "You're going to kill yourself."

"I've lived a long time. I don't have any regrets."

"Don't talk like that, or I'm going to go get Rimma."

He shuddered visibly at the thought of Mikhail's spoiled little cousin. "Relax, Mikhail. The ELS absorb the alcohol before it can affect me too much. I can't get drunk, no matter how much I drink."

He just shook his head and said, "Can you at least put it down while we talk? This is important."

"It wouldn't be much different than if I drank water. Not for me."

"Still."

"Fine…" Setsuna silently cursed. The boy could convince him to do anything. He opened a drawer with cup holders designed with a suction effect to keep the drink inside and stuck the bottle in, holding his hands up in a show of peace. "There, happy?"

The teenager shrugged in response, then flashed a smile. "Yeah, I am."

He crossed his arms and closed his eyes. "Your grandfather said you had a report to relay?"

He sighed. "Always so professional, Uncle Setsuna. Yes, I do."

"And?"

"Well… I'm not sure how you'll handle this. Hang on, let me transfer to the station in my room."

That didn't settle well inside him. That meant it wasn't directly related to Celestial Being, since all of Allelujah's family were members. The fact that he didn't want to be overheard meant that it was personal. Mikhail was the person closest to Setsuna at the current moment in time, not counting his mental links with Tieria and the ELS.

He was ELS now. He had a constant connection with the rest, and could often hear their voices in his mind. The individual ELS that had physically merged with him was a kinder one, always looking to learn and explore new places. Because the ELS didn't have genders, he had named it 'Sami Karoti,' which meant 'assimilate' in his home language. During the years, he had started to use female pronouns for it and 'she' had since been nicknamed 'Sami' on a joint effort of Mileina and Lockon.

A second blip sounded and he glanced down in curiosity. Two messages in one day? On the anniversary, no less? He tapped the icon to open it, sighing at Mikhail's smiling face. "Hey, Uncle Setsuna! I changed stations."

"I see that." He inhaled a deep breath and leaned on one hand. "So, what's this report?"

"So impatient. It's not like time is a concern for you."

He flinched. His seemingly eternal youth was a touchy subject for him. He was still twenty-three in all appearances, but was forced to watch as his comrades—no, friends—grew old and moved closer and closer to death in happy lives with their families. While it was true that he could live on and continue to protect the world, he hadn't expected to feel pain as the others lived their lives. Instead of telling the boy that, he retorted, "It is for you."

Again, all he did was shrug. "It's not a waste to talk to you, Uncle Setsuna. You don't keep in contact too much, so I like to enjoy the times you do."

"Actually, your grandfather contacted me. Today…" He turned away, brushing his hand through his hair. "is not a good day."

"Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it's about to get worse, I think."

He glanced back at the screen, masking his expression with skill gained from seventy-three years of life. "Why hasn't Celestial Being contacted me on this, then? Instead, you're using a private channel."

"Because this isn't business related. It's… one of the third generation Celestial Being members. You knew her as Feldt Grace."

He blinked and leaned back. Against his better judgment, he asked, "Feldt?"

"Yes. I… know you were close to her."

"What happened to her?"

"Straight to the point, as always. According to the reports, we lost contact with her when she resigned from Celestial Being fifty years ago to live her life as a civilian. Of course, we respected that decision, but still-"

"What happened to her?" he repeated, his voice accented with a slight tinny sound. He felt the metallic taste of Sami seeping into his throat and encasing his trachea. For most people, they say their hearts freeze when they're afraid. For Setsuna F. Seiei, his heart would literally turn to steel. A quick glance in the mirror showed the skin of his neck and chin were starting to turn silver above his collar and he turned away, running his hand over his throat while trying to make it stop.

"She… Feldt Grace, former CIC operator of Celestial Being, is dead."

He felt his eyes widen in surprise as he jumped out of his chair, the metallic rush in his neck and chest spreading to consume his arms and spike out on his face and shoulders as a reaction of shock and pain. Feldt… was dead?

"Uncle Setsuna? Your face…"

He reached up, absently touching one of the spikes and drawing back from the monitor. He willed the ELS within him to calm down and, gradually, the mutations on his body withdrew, retreating back into the basis of his being where she had made her home. Slowly, he pushed back on the table to draw away from the screen, then quietly said, "Please send me the data you have on this occurrence. I want to review it."

"Of course, Uncle Setsuna." The boy managed a weak smile, but looked about ready to cry. He certainly was related to Allelujah, that was for sure. He had his grandfather's sentimentality about everyone and everything.

"I'd like to be alone now. Send the data as soon as you can, and keep it encrypted. We don't want anyone to connect her family to the remnants of Celestial Being."

"Understood. You'll have it in-" He paused as a small sound alert blinked on his screen. "-now."

"Thank you. Tell your mother I said hello."

"I will. For what it's worth, I'm sorry, Uncle Setsuna."

He barely grunted a response before closing the window, effectively ending the conversation. Feldt Grace. No, Kira Lorre. She had died. But when? And how? She was younger than him, she would only be seventy-one. In this day of medical science, how could she die so young? The average lifespan was well over a hundred now. Even higher, what with all the Innovators springing up. He dropped his head to his hands and leaned his elbows on the desk, gripping his fingers in his hair.

How could this happen?

Hesitantly, he shifted to move one hand to accept the encrypted data transfer. He made quick work of the code locking it—Mileina Vashti had taught him all there was to know about hacking—and quickly scanned the files inside. A copy of her obituary, a brief write-up from the company she had worked for—Employee of the Year twelve years in a row—a plethora of documents including her death certificate and all other kinds of identification, and records regarding her expenses down to where she bought her bread.

Despite the fact that he was alone, he felt a slight snarl escape his lips. He didn't want to read about her private life. He only wanted to know why she'd died. He pushed her away so she could have her own life without being stalked by Celestial Being. Bringing up the window with her obituary, he scanned it briefly for anything about her cause of death.

_She's outlived by her daughter… That means she did finally settle down. Good. She was happy._

He sighed and leaned back again, vaguely glancing at all the documents before him without paying full attention. His focus snapped back into view as his eyes caught the last line of the obituary: _"…until she was laid to rest in a field by her home in Switzerland."_

_Switzerland…? I could be there today, but do I have the right?_

The tinny voices of Sami and the mentally-linked ELS whispered in his mind, speaking words that were illegible to anyone else. He shook his head, sighing. "What do you know?" He paused, listening to their response. "You think she would like it if I visit? But I told her I was dead to her, not the other way around."

Finally, he shifted out of his chair and shoved himself off towards the closet to change into a pressure suit. "You're right. I at least owe her my respects."

…

"Initiate external camouflage membrane. Reduce GN particle dispersal to minimal. Gundam Qan[T], now making entry to former A.E.U. territory, Switzerland."

He guided the Gundam down to a landing position in the hills beyond the field, letting it dock in an uninhabited area. He didn't want anyone to stumble upon it by accident. The camouflage kept it out of sight and as long as it didn't emit GN particles, it was untraceable by military standards. He sighed to himself, closing his eyes before shifting to stand and unzipping his blue flight suit. His casual clothes were undoubtedly outdated, but he wore them so infrequently that they stayed in crisp condition, so he didn't see a point in purchasing new ones. Besides, he never was one for caring about things like fashion.

Neither was Feldt.

He closed his eyes to collect his thoughts once before stepping into the boarding ring and gradually lowering to the ground. Glancing up, he watched as the hatch to Qan[T] closed and vanished into the camouflage, leaving no trace of the gigantic mobile suit.

When he touched the ground, he looked around once and slowly placed one foot in front of the other. It would be a decent walk up to the fields, but he hadn't wanted to crush any of the flowers in Feldt's beautiful burial place with his arrival. Besides, he could handle the walk. He wasn't even human. His body could take a few miles.

Not only that, but it gave him time to think.

Had he made the right decision in pushing her away? Of course. He was told that, after the ELS assimilation, he was no longer able to have children, and Feldt deserved to have children. She was too sweet and kindhearted to never have kids. She would have hated him if he'd prevented her from having a family. Maybe not directly, but somewhere down the walk of life, she would have blamed him.

Of course, he could have just stayed for a few years as a test, but that wouldn't have been fair to her. He hadn't known what to expect from his own body at the time, and he didn't want to risk her being placed in danger because of it. Even if he had known then, he knew that he would have had to leave her once he realized he wasn't aging. That would have broken her even more. She deserved to be treated better than that. It wasn't her fault that he became something else. She shouldn't have to suffer with him.

His only choice was to push her away from the start. Avoid letting her gain an attachment to him and leave her to find love elsewhere. It was the only sensible option and he knew it. He just hoped she had understood before it was too late.

He knew he made the right choice, but did he regret it? Naturally. There wasn't a day that went by that he didn't at least think of her. Did he wish they could have been together? He would have at least liked to try. He was old enough to have grandchildren, but even then he was a novice with love. Some days, when he was living alone on his personal spacecraft, his imagination would sometimes carry him away and let him wonder what life with Feldt would have been like if the ELS hadn't assimilated him.

Would she have been happy?

Would they have gotten married?

Would they have had children?

Would… she have lived longer?

They were all questions he would ponder, but he never had any answers. He had regrets, but he had known he'd made the right choice. It had been too long, anyway. He didn't really have a right to regret anymore. Besides, it was unfair of him. The obituary said she had a daughter, so she must have married and had a child. His remaining feelings for the girl were despicable, knowing full well she had loved another after him.

He stopped in his tracks, staring at the view a few meters ahead. There, amidst a patch of pink and yellow flowers, stood a tombstone. As he approached, his sharp eyesight made out the inscription from a distance. It read:

_Feldt Grace  
><em>_Beloved by all, she graced the world with her smile and love.  
><em>_December 28, 2293 - April 17, 2363_

He shifted to bend down to a kneeling position in front of the stone, gently reaching his tanned fingers out to touch her name. So, she had continued to be Feldt Grace, not Kira Lorre. To be here, standing over the grave of someone he had known so long ago, felt so strange. It seemed surreal, to know he sat over the dead body of a friend and momentary lover.

One night. They had been lovers for one night, but a part of him knew he would never forget the experience. He knew he would never accept that it was just one night. It was forever. He loved her all this time, even though he had no right to.

"Heeey! You there!"

He turned to look over his shoulder, his hand automatically reaching in the front of his jacket for his handgun. The girl who'd called out looked innocent enough, but he'd learned to never make assumptions. She was somewhat short in stature, with chin-length red hair and a bright smile. As she ran closer, she called out again, "Hey!"

He kept his back to the girl and his hand on his weapon, wary of what she might do, and asked, "Yes?"

She kept running until she stopped beside him, leaning over to catch her breath before flashing him a smile. "I haven't seen you before! Have you come to see Nana?"

Nana…? This girl was… Feldt's granddaughter? She didn't look a whole lot like the girl he loved, but instead had a tan complexion, red hair, and bright amber eyes. She was older than Feldt was at the last time he'd spoken to her. Probably about twenty-three or so. He supposed she could look more like her father or grandfather. After all, he had no reason to doubt her claim. "Your grandmother?"

She nodded with that ever-present smile. "Yup! Nana Feldt was the most amazing person in the world."

He offered a short dip of his chin in reply, finally letting go of his gun. "I know."

"I haven't seen you before. How'd you know her?"

He let his eyes drop from the stone, only for them to widen in surprise at the sight of the yellow desert flowers planted at the base of her headstone. Those flowers… They were the same as the one she had given to him all those years ago. He felt a smile cross his lips as he touched one softly. "She entered my life a few years ago, and saved me from loneliness."

The girl smiled again and said, "She has a way about that. I didn't see you at the funeral, though."

"I… I didn't know until today. A friend told me and I came out here."

"Oh, I see. I'm sorry. We got in touch with everyone in her contacts."

"It's no surprise I wasn't listed. Our friendship was a strange one."

Her smile brightened and she held her hand out towards him. "Oh, I haven't introduced myself, have I? I'm Setsuna F. Schiell."

He froze, his mind going blank in shock. "S-Setsuna. That's an unusual name."

"Yeah, I know," she chirped, shifting to sit down in the flowers beside him. "My mom asked Nana to name me. She said that she wanted me to be Setsuna regardless of whether I turned out to be a boy or a girl. The 'F' stands for Feldt. My mom and I think Setsuna was my grandpa's name. Nana called me by my full name, with Setsuna F., but everyone else calls me 'Sunie.'"

He blinked, slowly turning to look at her. "Is that so? You don't know your grandfather? Feldt never talked about her family to me."

She shook her head. "Nope! Nana never married. She said my mom's dad died before she was born. She won't talk about him, either, but my mom thinks he's of Middle Eastern descent. She has darker skin than mine, but not really dark. It's pretty close to yours, now that I think about it. Are you from the Middle East?"

He managed a slight smile in response to her enthusiasm, replying, "Yes. My name is Ketan Amarnath. I'm from a region in Azadistan, but I travel a lot. I haven't been back that way in quite awhile."

"I see," she said, leaning back and glancing at the tombstone.

His mind automatically started to piece together the bits this girl had told him. Everything pointed towards one fact: Feldt had never married and this female Setsuna's mother was, in turn, his own daughter. But that was impossible. He couldn't have children. The doctors involved with Celestial Being had given him a full examination after the ELS assimilated him to see what had changed.

He shouldn't have been able to sire any children.

He shifted to sit down with one knee propped up and rested his arm on it, staring blankly at the stone. He needed more data, and this girl was sitting right here, so full of energy and willingness to connect with someone her grandmother had known who looked her age. "Sunie, what year was your mother born?"

That would get him his answer.

She peered at him curiously. "Why ask something like that?"

He shot her a small smile in an attempt to be friendly. If he was right, then this girl would be… "I have a theory, but I need to make sure."

She eyed him oddly before touching her finger to her chin in thought. "My mom was born in early 2315, I'm pretty sure. Care to share?"

He did the math in his head quickly. After spending so many years without a lot of change, events tended to blur together easily. 2315 would have been… "I knew it."

She peered at him curiously. "Ketan?"

He reached in his jacket and withdrew his portable terminal and shuffled through the folders of files quickly before showing a picture to her. She glanced at the picture of the pink-haired girl standing with a shy smile beside a disgruntled-looking young man with black hair and red eyes. She cocked her head, saying, "That looks like you, but… the girl looks like Nana when she was young. How?"

"That man… That was my family line fifty years ago, standing beside one Feldt Grace. The timeline fits with when they worked together, according to him. He told me he used to work with this girl in the picture from 2305 to 2314. He said they had a romance between them, though it was brief. He… He used to tell me about how he never fully let her go."

"Um, I don't mean to be presumptuous, but was he your grandfather, then?"

He didn't want to lie to her. Not to his… his granddaughter. But he couldn't tell her the truth, either. He'd already lied about his name, anyway. "Yeah."

"What was his name?"

His eyes focused on the picture, staring blankly at Feldt's shy expression. The picture was one Mileina had taken after she'd picked up on her friend's feelings for him and she'd forced them to stand together for a picture, then immediately sent copies to either of them. "His name… was Setsuna F. Seiei."

"Setsuna…? I see. That makes sense, then." She smiled brightly and held out her hand. "I guess that makes us family, then! We share a granddad."

"Yeah. I guess so." His attention shifted to look up at the setting sun, his lungs releasing a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Feldt… Feldt had given birth to his child. A child he never knew existed, and now had discovered that girl's daughter by pure chance.

He'd have to discuss the privacy issue with the rest of Celestial Being. He would like to know his family.

He just hoped he wasn't too late.

_Feldt, can you forgive me?_

…

"Allelujah, can you do me a favor?"

The man on the handheld screen peered at him curiously. "What is it, Setsuna?"

He kept his expression masked, doing his best to hide the fear he felt and the pain he caused. He stood a few meters away from his granddaughter while she tended to Feldt's grave, calling Allelujah on a private channel. "Can you get me clearance to discuss secrets with an unknown?"

He blinked in shock. "Uh, what? What kind of secrets?"

"Sami and my condition."

"To what kind of unknown? I mean, this is strange for you."

"Allelujah…" He turned away slowly, glancing at the girl out of the corner of his eye. "I just met my granddaughter."

He wasn't looking at the screen, but he looked back when a crash sounded and his old friend climbed up off the floor. "You _what?_"

"I met my granddaughter, Allelujah. Feldt gave birth to my daughter after we went our separate ways. Fifty years later, and…"

"Did you… Did you go to see Feldt, then?" he asked, still trying to get over the shock of the news.

Setsuna wasn't sure why, but Allelujah seemed more surprised than he was. "So to speak. It's her grave, really. That's what Mikhail wanted to tell me."

"I… see… So, let me get this straight. Feldt…" He paused, choking slightly on his own words. "…died, and now you find out she gave birth to your child?"

"That about sums it up. The facts all add together. We can conduct a biometrics scan to be sure, but I want permission to discuss my condition. My… My family has a right to know."

"I wouldn't dream of stopping you, Setsuna. I just can't get over the fact that you… You're suddenly a father. But… you don't look really shocked."

"I've gotten good at masking my emotions over the years."

"So, you really are shocked?"

"If I don't sit down, I might pass out in the next few minutes."

He managed a smile in response. "You know what, just tell them. They're your family, and they have a right to know. Besides, you don't have to mention your involvement with Celestial Being. For now, maybe you can start with the ELS and the Innovator bits?"

"All right. Thanks, Allelujah."

"But, seriously? You and Feldt… were serious?"

"We'll talk later. Maybe. Setsuna invited me to her mother's house."

"Um, Setsuna?"

"My granddaughter. I'm going to send you her biometrics I picked up. Let me know what you find. Keep this as quiet as possible, please."

He offered a smile and a nod. "Understood. Allelujah, over and out. Good luck, Setsuna."

"Thanks. I think I'll need it." Without waiting for a response, he tapped the button to end the call and turned back to the female Setsuna. Time to truly meet his family. He approached her in a few short steps and stood behind her, offering a small smile. "Hey, Sunie. You said your mother lives around here? I'd like to meet Feldt's family."

She smiled and jumped to her feet. "Yeah. Come on, we're staying in Nana's old place."

Setsuna F. Seiei was a lot of things. He was a child guerilla and a Gundam Meister of Celestial Being. He was a murderer and a liar. He was an Innovator and an ELS. He was vengeful and defiant. He would never back down, and he would die to see peace realized.

One thing he wasn't, however, was prepared to discover he had a family.

He often wondered what life with Feldt would have been like if the ELS hadn't assimilated him. He wondered if she would be happy, if they would have gotten married, or if they would have had children. He knew that there was never a way to reverse time or bring back the dead, and Feldt was gone forever. But she had left a family behind for him, and he would do everything he could to make sure that family was happy and safe.

He owed it to her and he owed it to them.

He would be the father he should have been before.

* * *

><p>Well, that's the end! This is my first (completed) Gundam 00 fic, and I'm pretty happy with it. Now I have a Code Geass fic I should write, but my brain is conjuring up a variety of G00 oneshots, too. : Anyway, comments would be appreciated!

Please review!

-Valk


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